Thanks-[for]-Giving

How a simple shift in gratitude can make a world of difference?

Here in America, we celebrated our Thanksgiving Holiday last week. The holiday symbolizes the end of the harvest season and is a day of celebration and thanks for the abundance and good fortune we have in our lives, no matter how meager or scarce.

This Thanksgiving, I invite you to take a look at how a simple shift to being grateful for what you have been able to give may be more powerful, creative, and worthy of celebration than merely being grateful for what you have received. In fact, you might even start a revolution that truly brings greater abundance and good fortune to both your life and the world.

I don’t believe that we are automatically entitled to abundance, nor that abundance is something that we can simply wish or believe into existence. It’s been my experience that the world works on a give and then receive basis and that true abundance is something we create and we create abundance by generating value.

Generating value is not rearranging, accumulating, reallocating, or exchanging one value for another. It’s not about taking value away from anyone. To generate value means to create or add new value; value and goodness that did not previously exist. For instance, when you smile at someone or hold a door for them you create new value. When you help someone to learn, to grow, or to unleash their potential you create new value. When you ease suffering or bring a measure of joy without taking anything away from anyone else, including yourself, you generate new value.

Creating value is like creating a new source of renewable energy; once created it can perpetuate and build upon itself. This is the basic principle behind the “pay it forward” and “random acts of kindness” concepts.

This Thanksgiving, and from this day forth, try first being grateful for the opportunities you had to generate value; to make a difference and to give of yourself. Then, and only then, celebrate gratitude for the value and goodness that has come back to you as result of your generosity. If you don’t have anything to be grateful for, go create it!

Just keep asking yourself The Central Question – “What choice can I make and action can I take, in this moment, to create the greatest net value?”

What you may notice is that the more value you generate in the world, the more abundance you experience for yourself.

Imagine if you shared this notion with just one other person and they began to think of gratitude this way. Who knows what might happen. If people practiced this form of gratitude and began to see the powerful connection between the value we create and the value we are blessed to receive as a result, people would be creating value like crazy. I mean, think about it: if you shared it with just two or three people a day, I say just two or three people, and then they shared it with two or three people and everybody started creating greater value. Well, that would make YOU the instigator of immeasurable new value.

Can you imagine if a hundred, or a thousand, or a million, or one hundred million people all around the world were giving thanks for the value they’ve been able to create that day! And friends, that’s what it is. It’s the start of the Gen-V 2020 Revolution. It could create a global paradigm shift from a self-centric mindset to a value-centric mindset and put an end to conflict, suffering and scarcity! And all you need to do to join is to start thinking more value-centrically: asking yourself “The Central Question” and giving thanks FOR giving and only then for the blessings of true abundance that come as a result.

Wimpy Leaders

You cannot be wimpy out there on the dream-seeking trail. Dare to break through barriers, to find your own path. ~ Les Brown.

I have written about bully leaders previously, but I have not addressed until now, the other end of the spectrum – wimpy bosses. While not as obnoxious as a bully boss, the wimpy leader can be exasperating in different ways.

There are numerous characteristics that define a boss as being on the wimpy side, here are six habits that stand out to me:

1. Procrastination, slow decisions, analysis paralysis

I am reminded of the cartoon character “Wimpy” in the Popeye Cartoon, (I know I am dating myself – and as Groucho used to say, “If you are dating yourself, you aren’t likely to have many children”). Wimpy was famous for the line, “I would gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today.” That characteristic of postponing things is one of the hallmarks of a wimpy boss. Regardless of the issue, there are some bosses who do not want to face making a decision, so they ask for more analysis or more time. Eventually people get the message that there isn’t going to be a firm answer.

2. Not standing up for people in discussions with higher management 

Another trait of a wimpy boss is that the person will not stand up for people who work for him or her. If upper layers of management perceive an individual incorrectly, the wimpy boss is going to be a “yes man” and not challenge the misconception.

3. Waffling depending on which way the wind is blowing - "flip-flopping" 

Wimpy bosses do not hold firm to decisions made on principle. They bend with the breeze coming from on high and waffle when asked to take a stand on issues involving integrity. They are like chameleons and change colors to blend in with the background.

4. No backbone, does not confront people who abuse 

When a person is abusing other employees, the wimpy boss does not step in with strong action to stop the problem. Instead, problems are allowed to fester and well up because the boss has no strength or backbone.

5. Using Authority instead of Power 

To make up for the perception of being weaker, these bosses who have not earned sufficient power make the mistake of trying to influence others by overexerting their authority. But excessive use of authority can cause employees to rebel in much the same way that children rebel against restrictive parents.

6. Encouraging ‘up-delegated’ tasks 

Too nice is being a doormat and letting people walk all over you. To placate whiny employees and squeaky wheels - primarily because you were too weak to fight for and provide the resources in the first place - you do their work for them or place more of a burden on others. Eventually, everybody is doing nothing but complaining.

What can you do if you have a wimpy boss? That is a really good question, because you are not likely to change this person. The weak habits are a form of self preservation, laziness, or just plain being gutless. No amount of coaching is likely to reverse a lifetime of bad habits in this area. It can be very frustrating because it seems there is little you can do short of leaving the organization.

Here are some ideas that can help if applied with care.

1.    Document your requests and needs well. Don't let things slip. 

If you are reporting to a wimpy boss, the best you can do is document your requests carefully and make sure you copy others, such as senior management or HR in on your requests.

2.    Put a "date by" on all requests and check if late. 

Make sure the need for decisions have a date fixed to them and that a large number of people are aware of the delivery date. If needed, send reminders a reasonable time before the due date.

3. Follow up on all discussions and promises.

Hold the boss to promises made. 

4. Reinforce when the boss does show some backbone. 

If you see some signs of strength emerging, reinforce the boss enthusiastically for taking action. It will serve to encourage stronger action in the future.

5. Gently suggest some leadership training if appropriate. 

Lastly, training can help a wimpy boss learn how to handle difficult situations and also make more firm decisions. You may not be in a position to nudge the boss directly to get some training, but there could be indirect ways to let it be known that some additional seasoning would be beneficial. Each organization will have a different political hierarchy that includes not only the wimpy boss but also that person’s peers, manager, HR, and the Development Group. As an underling to a wimpy boss, you need to be careful how and when you point out opportunities for improvement.

Time to look in the mirror to ask yourself: “Where am I being a Wimpy Leader? Where do I need to be The Decider?”

I would love to hear your stories of Wimpy Leaders – please share in the comments below.

Snow Ball Effect

In many ways, the first small steps you take to change your behavior are the most important. Once you initiate change, it seems to feed on itself, as two psychological triggers are at work:

a.    More exposure effect: The more you are exposed to something, the more you like it. Initially unwelcome change efforts will gradually be perceived more favorably as people get used to them.

b.    Cognitive dissonance: Once people take small steps, it becomes increasingly difficult for them to dislike how they act. We don’t like to act in one way and think in another. And once we begin to behave differently, our self-perception changes and our identity evolves, which reinforces our new approach.

This is what is called ‘the snowball effect’. Changes just seem to take off. They are the result of “small wins” but, not always. Rather, they are automatic forces that kick in as time passes.

It’s therefore essential to start as soon as possible and take advantage of the momentum.

While inertia and the status quo may exert an irresistible pull, at this point you need to muster the courage and just do it. Just get it started.

Ah, yes, but that’s the problem, isn’t it? The status quo feels comfortable and steady because much of our thinking is on autopilot. Routines feel good to us because it frees up our brain for other things, especially creative thinking.

What really helps me to get started when I want to change a behavior is to become aware of how much I am on autopilot. Having routines can be a time-saver since we don’t have to make choices, we just do it. But it’s also what creates rut and stagnation.

It actually irks me to be a slave to my habits (just the ones I don’t like). I tell myself, “Who’s in charge here, the autopilot or me?” If I am more powerful than that, I will actually feel energized by breaking the routine to do something new.

Your first attempt doesn’t have to be perfect or complete. At some point, inertia will shift from resisting change to supporting it, and small changes will snowball into big changes.

But it’s that first effort to say, “No, I am not going to eat that over sized portion on my plate,” that builds the momentum. At the next meal, you become aware of how restaurants over serve their portions (here in the USA), and you start cutting down meal sizes.

·        It’s that first time you respond with a smile to someone who pushes your buttons.

·        It’s when you stop yourself from explaining everything and ask a question instead.

·        It’s when you stop telling yourself you are tired and start asking how you can re-energize your tasks.

When I stop looking for how I can cut corners and make my work flow a routine, and start looking for creative ways to make a difference in the world, then I become more of a change agent.

It starts with the first snowball, and I am the one who has to set it in motion. Then it becomes fun to watch it grow and gather momentum.

What has been your experience when you want to change something?

Decisions and Motivation

Everyone makes decisions differently and is motivated or driven by different things. Being aware of and understanding these differences are really important when managing employees or creating relationships.

Over fifty years of scientific research has revealed that there are three distinct styles of decision-making. Each of us can make decisions in all three ways, but we tend to develop a preference for one more than the other two. This preference becomes a subconscious force, affecting the decisions we make on a daily basis and shaping how we perceive the world around us and ourselves. The three decisional styles are personal, practical, and analytical.

To some extent everyone is capable of making all three kinds of decisions, but we ultimately have a preference. Here is a simple example of the three in contrast with each other. A person with each style is sitting around a table working on a project together. While the Personal style is focused on the needs of the team members involved and how to best use their talents, the Practical style doesn’t really care as much about the team or if it is done right, he just wants to get it done. Finally the Analytical sees no reason to worry about the people involved or even getting it done if it isn’t going to be done correctly.

We all have different balances of these three styles. That is what makes our decisions and actions different from others. These ways of making decisions and how we use them are at the core of whom we are.

In addition to there being three distinct styles of decision making, people are also motivated to make decisions based on different drivers. Based on the research of Dr. Eduard Spranger and later by Dr. Gordon Allport, there are seven key motivational drivers and they include the following:

§ The motivation to achieve balance, harmony, and find form or beauty

§ The motivation for security from economic gain and to achieve practical returns

§ The motivation to be seen as unique, independent, and stand apart from the crowd

§ The motivation to have influence and control over one’s environment or success

§ The motivation to benefit others in a humanitarian sense

§ The motivation to establish order, routine, and structure

§ The motivation to gain knowledge or discover truth

Imagine how beneficial it would be to know how your team members make decisions and why they are motivated to do what they do. Imagine being able to share that knowledge with the actual team members. Communication, teamwork, and your ability to manage would instantly improve. Results and outcomes would measurably improve. Uncovering how people make decisions and what drives them to do what they do can be uncovered through a simple assessment process. However, the assessment process is only the beginning. A commitment by management to create an action plan on how to effectively use the knowledge to improve team building is a critical second step. Information for information’s sake is—you got it—just information. An action plan to manage with the new information will provide long-term and sustainable results for your team.

Motivation and Process Improvement

“Managers do not motivate employees by giving them higher wages, more benefits, or new status symbols. Rather, employees are motivated by their own inherent need to succeed at a challenging task. The manager’s job then, is not to motivate people to get them to achieve; instead, the manager should provide opportunities for people to achieve, so they will become motivated.” – Frederick Herzberg.


So what does this theory have to do with process improvement? When done properly, motivation is a core component to process improvement, total quality, 6 Sigma, lean, or whatever other description one uses to express this philosophy that according to W. Edwards Deming causes 85% to 90% of an organization’s problems. It has been proven time and time again that “bad processes will always squash good people.”


Typically project members do not go to work with the preconceived attitude of, “I can’t wait to get to work to see what I can screw up today.” Most employees are committed to doing a good job and providing desired results. Very often, however, when management does not see the desired or forecasted outcomes, they begin the search for the bad apples. “Who caused this to happen, rather than what caused this to happen?”


It is our experience that the “what caused this to happen” i.e. a bad process, is more often the actual cause of bad outcomes rather than “who caused it to happen?”. “What caused this to happen” is typically a defective or ineffective process. In the classic sense a process is the series of interrelated steps to complete a task, and this applies to both business (programs/projects) processes and manufacturing processes. Management designs the majority of business and manufacturing processes and employees are instructed and trained to follow them – good or bad. If the process is good then the outcomes are good. However, if there is waste and variation built into the process, outcomes will be neither consistent nor predictable. This lack of predictability causes frustration at all levels within an organization but the frustrations are often magnified at the employee level, because they live within the processes daily. As such, employees know there is a better way to do things, but management doesn’t allow or encourage them to find it. Even if permission and encouragement is given, it is important that it is done correctly. Without the proper understanding and knowledge of process improvement tools to guide the discussions, greater frustration is created during the analysis, the decision process and the improvement phases.


A more effective approach is to provide everyone with the training necessary to best understand and utilize proven process improvement tools and to create a structure to allow project team members to find and eliminate variation and/or waste in an existing process. Giving employees this opportunity is one way to operationalizing Frederick Herzberg’s above definition of motivation. Highly motivated employees who have been given the opportunity to be involved in process improvement will generate accelerated results for the organization allowing them to run circles around their competition. Additionally, the results of process improvement, when identified and implemented by the employees, who are actually doing the work, achieve quick, bottom-line economic gains, greater employee loyalty with higher morale, and more satisfied customers who will be loyal to your products or services.