Mentor Power

Since January 2013 is the National Mentoring month, I'll take this opportunity to write about how mentoring works and typical benefits both for the mentor and the protégé. If you do not have at least one active mentor, you are missing a lot. In my experience, having a strong mentor in my life made a huge difference in my career. Even now, in my ripening middle age, I am still gaining benefits from the lessons and ideas planted in me by my mentor when I was younger.

There are obvious benefits of having a mentor in your life:

1. A mentor helps you learn the ropes faster

2. A mentor coaches you on what to do and especially what to avoid.

3. A mentor is an advocate for you in different circles than yours.

4. A mentor helps you clean up when you make a mistake and helps protect your reputation.

5. A mentor pushes you when you need pushing and praises you when you need it.

6. A mentor brings wisdom born of mistakes made in the past so you can avoid them.

7. A mentor operates as a sounding board for ideas and methods.

I support the idea of fostering mentors, but the typical mentor programs in most organizations are procedural rather than organic.

The more productive program seeks to educate professionals on the benefits of having a mentor and encourage people to find their own match. This strategy works much better because the chemistry is right from the start, and both parties immediately see the huge gains being made by both people. It is a mutually-supported organic system rather than an activities-based approach. It is pretty obvious how the protégé benefits in a mentor relationship, but how does the mentor gain from it?

Mentors also gain significantly in many ways:

1. The mentor focuses on helping the protégé, which is personally satisfying.

2. The mentor can gain information from a different level of awareness that may not be readily available by any other means.

3. The mentor helps find information and resources for the protégé, so there is some important learning going on. The best way to learn something is to teach it to someone else.

4. While pushing the protégé forward in life, the mentor has the ability to return some favors owed to others.

5. The mentor gains a reputation for nurturing people and can thus attract better people over time.

6. The mentor can enhance his or her legacy by creating an understudy.

Encourage a strong mentoring program but steer clear of the mechanical match game and the busywork of an overdone process. Let people recognize the benefits and figure out their optimal relationships.

Values Build Successful Business

Following up on the Round-Table discussion that we had last week on the VoARadio Network, I am going to elaborate a little bit more on how values help leaders bring consistency and meaning to their purpose.

“The very essence of leadership is that you have a vision. It’s got to be a vision you articulate clearly and forcefully on every occasion. You can’t blow an uncertain trumpet.” – Father Theodore Hesburgh (former President of the University of Notre Dame).

A powerful vision provides inspiration, challenge, and purpose. It gives meaning to your work and purpose to your life. Your career gives you a place where you can satisfy your need to achieve. Everyone’s life needs a purpose, something important to strive for. One way to add both meaning and context to your vision is to establish values. Clearly defined values simplify decision making. They also help ensure consistency as well as ethical and behavioral standards/congruency.

Value is a word that describes what each of us searches for in many different places. We look for value in what we purchase. We look for value in what we do, and aspire for value in our relationships. Most of us would like to believe that there would have been some value to our life and to our accomplishments. In today’s global and ever-changing economic environment, values should play an important role in structuring, planning, and operating your business. Direction is provided in part by vision, which creates excitement, commitment, and purpose. Achievement and excitement must be tempered, however, by values lest people pursue goals without consideration for the ethics of other people. Values represent the core priorities in the organization’s culture including what drives individuals and how they truly act in an organization. Therefore, another key element of a successful planning process is the organization’s value statement. Throughout the life of the business, decisions must be made. Core values of the organization will lay the foundation and provide the framework for all decisions.

An organization’s values create a foundation for integrity and they define the important truths that guide your actions. They will serve as a guidepost for all those in the organization who through their individual efforts will collectively achieve the organizational goals. Values are principles or standards by which we do business and are to be non-negotiable. As you think about crystallizing your values, consider what you know to be right as well as how you want to be known by others.

If the primary function of your business is to attract and maintain customers in order to generate long-term profits or financial viability, then issues such as meeting client / customer expectations, delivering quality service, etc., must be included in the values statement. Your values should take into consideration the importance you place upon each stakeholder in your business. By definition, a stakeholder is anyone who has the power to exert influence on your organization. It may be an individual, a group, or another organization. For example, your stakeholders could include your customers, your employees and their families, your stockholders, the community, licensing and regulatory agencies, or suppliers.

Some examples of value statements are:

§ Improving the quality of life through technology and innovation.

§ The company exists to alleviate pain and disease.

§ To be regarded by our customers as easy to deal with and as a provider of high-quality, reliable products and services.

§ Our first concern is for our customer, our second concern is for our employees, our third concern is for our management, our fourth concern is for our community, and our fifth concern is for our stockholders.

There are many companies in the media over the last several years that clearly operated and made decisions with no values and we are all aware of how it impacted people’s lives. However, there are a lot of companies who have well defined values and make decisions with those values ever present.

Here are a couple of examples of such businesses: Learn why Chick-fil-A is closed on Sunday and why they believe it is part of their recipe for success.

Also, learn why McNeil Consumer Healthcare initiated a voluntary recall of all their children and infant liquid products in 2010.

What value statement(s) are you living by?

Fail More Often

Continuing on our theme, 'Fear of Failure', it seems that in our society, it is considered a bad thing to fail. From our earliest memory, we are all taught to succeed at what we try. It does not matter if it is taking a few steps on wobbly legs or negotiating an international merger of two huge organizations, we are conditioned that success is the goal and failure is anathema. Through this conditioning, we are taught to feel great when we succeed and to feel awful when we fail.

Take away the stigma of the word, and a failure is simply an attempt to do something that did not work out as planned. In the learning process, we obtain more information, momentum, resolve, inspiration, insight, and knowledge when we fail than when we succeed. To succeed is to get something done, but we have not learned very much. For example, without the corrective adjustments by ourselves and our parents, we would never learn to walk or talk. It is the constant reshaping of previous attempts that cause our forward progress.

People need to embrace failure and to stop feeling bad about it. What we need in life is more 'at-bats' rather than more home runs. Each time we go for something new, we risk failure, but not taking that risk is a bigger problem, because we block our own advancement.

The most often-quoted example of this theory is the story of Thomas Edison, who found that carbonized bamboo filaments worked well for his light bulb. To re-cap his most famous quotation: “I have not failed, I have just found 10,000 things that won’t work.” He also acknowledged that by being creative while simultaneously inventive, he was able to develop things that seemed like serendipity, but they were really the culmination of a lot of hard work and numerous failures. He once said, “Just because something doesn’t do what you planned it to doesn’t mean it’s useless.”

The key to embracing failure is to let go of the stigma and seek out the learning potential in every activity. They ought to teach a course on failing in schools. Kids should be introduced to the concepts of failure - as long as something was learned - as the route to eventual success. Instead, we hammer home the idea that to fail is to not live up to expectations. Children learn to fear rather than embrace failure. That attitude permeates our society, and it has a crippling effect on every organization.

Another aspect of failure is the idea that we never really fail until we quit trying. As long as we are stretching to achieve a goal, we have the potential for success. I love the quotation from Vince Lombardi who said, “We never lost a game, but sometimes we just ran out of quarters.”

I believe there needs to be good judgment when deciding how long to persevere. I do not think Winston Churchill was right when he said “Never, never, never, quit.” At some point, it is time to learn a lesson and leave the battlefield. It is okay to have a discarded scheme or to recognize a blind alley and cut your losses. It is important to recognize when we have run out of quarters, but it is wrong to quit trying prematurely. I think the difference between those two mindsets is the difference between genius and mediocrity.

I am not advocating that we fail on purpose. Doing things right should always be the objective. What I want to champion is that the only thing to avoid is making the same mistake over and over again. Some people focus on being busy just to have something to do. Thomas Edison had a quote for that too. He said, “Being busy does not always mean real work.”

Institute an “Experience Award” at work for daring to risk. Honor people who stretch and try but fail, as long as they learn from the experience. It may seem unorthodox and “over the top” to many stuffy managers who will not tolerate things that are irregular. Too bad these managers are leaving real creativity off the table.

Why Failure Is Good for Success

This week's article is a follow-up to my last week's radio talk, on the Fear of Failure. To achieve the greatest success, you have to embrace the prospect of failure.

The sweetest victory is the one that’s most difficult. The one that requires you to reach down deep inside, to fight with everything you have got, to be willing to leave everything out there on the battlefield—without knowing, until that do-or-die moment, if your heroic effort will be enough.

Society does not reward defeat, and you won’t find many failures documented in history books. The exceptions are those failures that become steppingstones to later success. Such is the case with Thomas Edison, whose most memorable invention was the light bulb, which purportedly took him 1,000 tries before he developed a successful prototype. When a reporter asked “How did it feel to fail that many times?” Edison's response was, “I have not failed. I have just found 10,000 ways that won't work.” 

Unlike Edison, many of us avoid the prospect of failure. In fact, we are so focused on not failing that we don’t aim for success, settling instead for a life of mediocrity. When we do make missteps, we gloss over them, selectively editing out the miscalculations or mistakes in our life’s résumé.

“Failure is not an option,” NASA flight controller Jerry C. Bostick reportedly stated during the mission to bring the damaged Apollo 13 back to Earth, and that phrase has been etched into the collective memory ever since.

To many in our success-driven society, failure is not just considered a non-option—it’s deemed a deficiency, says Kathryn Schulz, author of Being Wrong: Adventures in the Margin of Error. “Of all the things we are wrong about, this idea of error might well top the list,” Schulz says. “It is our meta-mistake: We are wrong about what it means to be wrong. Far from being a sign of intellectual inferiority, the capacity to err is crucial to human cognition.”

Life’s Greatest Teacher

When we take a closer look at the great thinkers throughout history, a willingness to take on failure is not a new or extraordinary thought at all. From the likes of Augustine, Darwin and Freud to the business mavericks and sports legends of today, failure is as powerful a tool as any in reaching great success.

“Failure and defeat are life’s greatest teachers but, sadly, most people, and particularly conservative corporate cultures, don’t want to go there,” says Ralph Heath, managing partner of Synergy Leadership Group and author of Celebrating Failure: The Power of Taking Risks, Making Mistakes and Thinking Big. “Instead they choose to play it safe, to fly below the radar, repeating the same safe choices over and over again. They operate under the belief that if they make no waves, they attract no attention; no one will yell at them for failing because they generally never attempt anything great at which they could possibly fail (or succeed).”

However, in today’s post-recession economy, some employers are no longer shying away from failure—they are embracing it. According to a recent article in Business Week, many companies are deliberately seeking out those with track records reflecting both failure and success, believing that those who have been in the trenches, survived battle and come out on the other side have irreplaceable experience and perseverance. They are veterans of failure.

The prevailing school of thought in progressive companies—such as Intuit, General Electric, Corning and Virgin Atlantic—is that great success depends on great risk, and failure is simply a common byproduct. Executives of such organizations don’t mourn their mistakes but instead parlay them into future gains.

“The quickest road to success is to possess an attitude toward failure of ‘no fear,’ ” says Heath. “To do their work well, to be successful and to keep their companies competitive, leaders and workers on the front lines need to stick their necks out a mile every day. They have to deliver risky, edgy, breakthrough ideas, plans, presentations, advice, technology, products, leadership, bills and more. And they have to deliver all this fearlessly—without any fear whatsoever of failure, rejection or punishment.”

Reaching Your Potential

The same holds true for personal quests, whether in overcoming some specific challenge or reaching your full potential in all aspects of life. To achieve your personal best, to reach unparalleled heights, to make the impossible possible, you can’t fear failure, you must think big, and you have to push yourself.

When we think of people with this mindset, we imagine the daredevils, the pioneers, the inventors, the explorers: They embrace failure as a necessary step to unprecedented success.

But you don’t have to walk a tightrope, climb Mount Everest or cure polio to employ this mindset in your own life. When the rewards of success are great, embracing possible failure is key to taking on a variety of challenges, whether you are reinventing yourself by starting a new business or allowing yourself to trust another person to build a deeper relationship.

“To achieve any worthy goal, you must take risks,” says writer and speaker John C. Maxwell. In his book Failing Forward: Turning Mistakes into Stepping Stones for Success, he points to the example of legendary aviator Amelia Earhart, who set several records and achieved many firsts in her lifetime, including being the first female pilot to fly solo over the Atlantic Ocean. Although her final flight proved fateful, Maxwell believes she knew the risk—and that the potential reward was worth it. “[Earhart’s] advice when it came to risk was simple and direct: ‘Decide whether or not the goal is worth the risks involved. If it is, stop worrying.’ ”

Of course, the risks you take should be calculated; you should not fly blindly into the night and simply hope for the best. Achieving the goal or at least waging a heroic effort requires preparation, practice and some awareness of your skills and talents.

Easing Into a Fearless Mindset

“One of the biggest secrets to success is operating inside your strength zone but outside of your comfort zone,” Heath says. Although you might fail incredibly, you might succeed incredibly—and that’s why incredible risk and courage are requisite. Either way, you’ll learn more than ever about your strengths, talents and resolve, and you’ll strengthen your will for the next challenge.

If this sounds like dangerous territory, it can be. But there are ways to ease into this fearless mindset. The first is to consciously maintain a positive attitude so that, no matter what you encounter, you’ll be able to see the lessons of the experience and continue to push forward.

“It’s true that not everyone is positive by nature,” says Maxwell, who cites his father as someone who would describe himself as a negative person by nature. “Here’s how my dad changed his attitude. First he made a choice: He continually chooses to have a positive attitude. Second, he’s continually reading and listening to materials that bolster that attitude. For example, he’s read The Power of Positive Thinking many times. I did not get it at first, so once I asked him why. His response: ‘Son, I need to keep filling the tank so I can stay positive.’ ”

Heath recommends studying the failures and subsequent reactions of successful people and, within a business context, repeating such histories for others. “Reward them and applaud their efforts in front of the entire organization so everyone understands it is OK to fail. So employees say to themselves, ‘I see that Bill, the vice president of widgets, who the president adores, failed, and he is not only back at work, but he is driving a hot new sports car. I can fail and come to work the next day. Bill is proof of it.’ ”

Finally, Heath stays motivated by the thought that, “if I become complacent and don’t take risks, someone will notice what I am doing and improve upon my efforts over time, and put me out of work. You have got to keep finding better ways to run your life, or someone will take what you have accomplished, improve upon it, and be very pleased with the results. Keep moving forward or die.”

Facts Don’t Change Behavior

According to NIH (National Institute of Health) if you weigh reasonably average, you will likely gain about a pound between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day. The problem, as per this study is, you probably won’t ever lose it. Despite the facts, I am going to guess most of you will not follow holiday fitness tips.

When we fall short of making permanent lifestyle modifications, we take comfort in the belief that, if we really wanted to change, we could alter our behaviors.

The difference between change and transformation is what in system's thinking is referred to as the difference between first order change and third order change. The first encompasses mostly changes in behaviors, while third order change changes beliefs, ways of looking at the world, and actions. That is why, transformation is way more profound and encompassing.

This is also partly why so many people don't like transformation. They are afraid it will change them intrinsically. We are always becoming, and the self growth and evolves in relation to others and how open are we to different experiences and ways of thinking.

Transformation requires us to use both our left and right sides of the brain. It's the left side that like to keep everything logical, orderly arranged. Does not like leaps into the unknown. Our more intuitive right side is the one that is willing to question and change. We need both, in order to be able to transform without disintegrating.